Doesn't Get Any Better...

The faithful love of the LORD never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.

-Lamentations 3:22-23 (NLT)

Thank you, Lord for loving everyone...even me...unconditionally! Help me love like you do! :)

Here I Go...

Well, I’m going to guess that most of you reading this already know me and bits and pieces of my life and my story…but, just in case you don’t, or you are interested in knowing a little more…

I’m Jena! The first and probably most important thing I’d like to share with you is how my life has been dramatically changed over the last few years…

In the past, I defined my life and even my worth by things like friends, clubs/organizations, parties, sports, boys, grades, looks, or any other thing that I thought would somehow gratify me. My mind was wrapped around questions and a constant search for fulfillment. Near the end of my senior year of high school I was at an FCA (Fellowship of Christian Athletes) meeting and a friend asked to play a song before everyone left. The song was “Awakening” by Seven Places – which was more of someone speaking than someone singing, but nonetheless, it spoke right to my heart. I quickly dismissed a lot of the things I mulled over after that by assuring myself that I was okay…I mean, I grew up going to church and Sunday school, I knew some Bible verses, I prayed every once in a while, and it’s not like I ever really did anything THAT bad.

It took some time for me to finally come to grips with the fact that being “good” wasn’t the point, and I actually wasn’t as “good” as I had imagined anyway. A few months into my first year of college a couple girls knocked on my door and asked me if I would be interested in checking out a discussion group. I still didn’t know too many people, so I figured at the least I could meet a few new girls that lived in the dorm. I honestly couldn’t tell you anything we talked about; the only things I remember from that night are hearing the story of how God had changed one girl’s life, seeing something called the bridge diagram, and A LOT of tears! The funny thing is I had seen that illustration and heard similar messages a million times before, but this time, it all “clicked”. (If you’ve never seen or heard of the bridge diagram, it pretty much shows the distance between man and God because of our disobedience, but explains that Jesus died on the cross to “bridge” that gap). God quickly opened my eyes to show me how far away from Him I had strayed and how all my seemly good actions had missed the mark, and my life would continue in the same direction without Him.

That night I heard something that was an entirely new concept to me…a “relationship” with Jesus Christ. God had always just been this big, distant, mysterious…thing…not really available for any sort of relationship?
Over Christmas break I was invited to attend a retreat in Nashville, TN. The week was full of new friends, sightseeing, very little sleep, and some very encouraging stories about college, about God, and about life in general. After everything I had heard, seen, and especially felt over the last few months, I finally knew what I needed; and the last night of the retreat (which happened to be New Years Eve), I decided to surrender my life to Jesus Christ. I don’t remember what I said, but I’m sure it wasn’t an elaborate prayer, and it didn’t need to be – God already knew everything I wanted and needed to say.

My heart and desires were radically changed, almost instantly. I could see how my attitude and behaviors were mean and hurtful, the pleasure I used to get from walking all over other people to build myself up was gone and I was heartbroken and ashamed of what had become second nature to me. But thankfully I didn’t have to worry about the past anymore, everything was gone…my slate was wiped completely clean.

Now, every day I do my best to live my life for the One who gave His life for me. It’s been about three and a half years since my Savior so graciously rescued me and I’m know I’m not the first to admit it’s not always easy, and I’m not even close to being perfect, so of course there are struggles. But, every time I’ve fallen down or wandered away, God has been right there, reaching out to pick me up and put me right back where I belong – beside Him.

So there's an introduction or maybe update for some of you :)…Oh, and the entries prior to this one are all old randoms from MySpace, just FYI...

Own This Spirit...

Jennifer Knapp - Undo Me

"...I Am Wanting, Needing, Guilty & Greedy,
Unrighteous, Unholy, Undo Me, Undo Me...
Three Nails And A Cross To Prove
I Owe My Life Eternally To YOU...
Time To Get Down On My Knees And Pray
Lord Undo Me..."

Jennifer Knapp - Undo Me

I Believe...

Just going through old e-mails...I found this! Thought it was pretty awesome! :)

I Believe - That Just Because Two People Argue, It Doesn't Mean They Don't Love Each Other. And Just Because They Don't Argue, It Doesn't Mean They Do.
I Believe - That We Don't Have To Change Friends If We Understand That Friends Change.
I Believe - That No Matter How Good A Friend Is, They're Going To Hurt You Once In A While And You Must Forgive Them For That.
I Believe - That True Friendship And True Love Continues To Grow, Even Over The Longest Distance.
I Believe - That You Can Do Something In An Instant That Will Give You Heartache For Life.
I Believe - That It's Taking Me A Long Time To Become The Person I Want To Be.
I Believe - That You Should Always Leave Loved Ones With Loving Words.
I Believe - That You Can Keep Going Long After You Think You Can't.
I Believe - That We Are Responsible For What We Do, No Matter How We Feel.
I Believe - That Either You Control Your Attitude Or It Controls You.
I Believe - That Heroes Are The People Who Do What Has To Be Done When It Needs To Be Done, Regardless Of The Consequences.
I Believe - That Money Is A Lousy Way Of Keeping Score.
I Believe - That Best Friends Can Do Anything Or Nothing And Have The Best Time.
I Believe - That Sometimes The People You Expect To Kick You When You're Down Will Be The Ones To Help You Get Back Up.
I Believe - That Sometimes When I'm Angry I Have The Right To Be Angry, But That Doesn't Give Me The Right To Be Cruel.
I Believe - That Maturity Has More To Do With What Types Of Experiences You’ve Had And What You've Learned From Them And Less To Do With How Many Birthdays You've Celebrated.
I Believe - That It Isn't Always Enough To Be Forgiven By Others. Sometimes You Have To Learn To Forgive Yourself.
I Believe - That No Matter How Bad Your Heart Is Broken. The World Doesn't Stop For Your Grief.
I Believe - That Our Background And Circumstances May Have Influenced Who We Are, But We Are Responsible For Who We Become
I Believe - That You Shouldn't Be So Eager To Find Out A Secret. It Could Change Your Life Forever.
I Believe - Two People Can Look At The Exact Same Thing And See Something Totally Different.
I Believe - That Your Life Can Be Changed In A Matter Of Seconds By People Who Don't Even Know You.
I Believe - That Even When You Think You Have No More To Give, When A Friend Cries Out To You - You Will Find The Strength To Help.
I Believe - That Credentials On The Wall Do Not Make You A Decent Human Being.
I Believe - That The People You Care About Most In Life Are Taken From You Too Soon.

P.S. I love you, friends! :)

It's Not Mine...

This was just something I REALLY needed to hear today...So, thought I'd share it! It's one of those ideas that I know all to well...just don't seem to whole-heartedly trust or belive...if that makes any sense at all! I mean why shouldn't I give every bit of my life every single day to God -- I mean really, it's not mine anyways! He paid the price, it's ALL for Him!

So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.

-Romans 12:1-2 (The Message)