If You Are Willing...

A man with leprosy came and knelt in front of Jesus, begging to be healed. “If you are willing, you can heal me and make me clean,” he said. Moved with compassion, Jesus reached out and touched him. “I am willing,” he said. “Be healed!” instantly the leprosy disappeared, and the man was healed. 

-Mark 1:40-42

Jesus may not physically be in front of me...and I may not have 'leprosy', per say, but...I've still got dirt. I still have frequent moments where I need to fall on my face and ask Jesus to make me clean. There is nothing I can do to fix my 'human condition'...nothing. There is only one way. One truth. One life. And that one touch is enough. His grace IS enough.

So, here I go. Kneeling in front of my savior. Begging to be healed. Lord, if you are willing...make me clean. Because you're the only one who can. 

He Hears My Voice...

Man, life gets hard sometimes. And life gets really dark sometimes. I start to wonder if I'm ever going to get a break. If there is ever a way out. I'm quick to believe the lies that Satan feeds me. I start thinking there is no use. It's too hard. God has had enough of my bull sh*t. I've been down this road. It's nothing new. I should have learned. I'M sick of trying to give myself second, third, fourth...hundred-and-fifty-seven-thousandth chance. Why would someone so perfect take me back again and again. I just always start to wonder. 

But, my God is so gracious and so merciful and his love abounds! I love when He brings me back to that place. That place where His love is so real. His mercy is so fresh. His grace is so amazing.

This Psalm is so perfect when I'm in these moments. I need to be reminded that God hears my voice. He BENDS DOWN TO LISTEN. Is that not a beautiful picture? 

I love the Lord because he hears my voice and my prayer for mercy. Because he bends down to listen, I will pray as long as I have breath! Death wrapped its ropes around me; the terrors of the grave overtook me. I saw only trouble and sorrow. Then I called on the name of the Lord: “Please, Lord, save me!” How kind the Lord is! How good he is! So merciful, this God of ours! The Lord protects those of childlike faith; I was facing death, and he saved me. Let my soul be at rest again, for the Lord has been good to me. He has saved me from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling. And so I walk in the Lord’s presence as I live here on earth!

-Psalm 116:1-9

Do Not Mix...

New and old DO NOT mix. I guess it really is that simple.

“Besides, who would patch old clothing with new cloth? For the new patch would shrink and rip away from the old cloth, leaving an even bigger tear than before. “And no one puts new wine into old wineskins. For the wine would burst the wineskins, and the wine and the skins would both be lost. New wine calls for new wineskins.”

-Mark 2:21-22

I'm so thankful for this reminder...a reminder and maybe even a little bit of a warning.

Thank you for making me new, Jesus. Please stop me from trying to mix the new with the old. You are all that I need.

Thank You For The Cross...

Man...Talk about something for which to be grateful!

Then God made you alive with Christ, for he forgave all our sins. He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross.

- Colossians 2:13-14 (NLT) 

Are these words not simply beautiful! He forgave ALL my sins! He CANCELED the record of charges against me! EVERYTHING was nailed to the cross! 

I'm not sure how I so often manage to let this perfect promise slip my mind! But those moments when I really 'get' it...when it all 'clicks'...those moments are the overwhelming, to say the least! God's love for me and for EVERYONE is unconditional! And nothing can ever change that, ever!

As much screwing up as I've done in the past and as much screwing up as I'll do in the future...Christ's blood has already covered it! That's is some seriously powerful LOVE!

Thank you for the CROSS!  

Forgive...

I can't count the number of times I've read this over the last couple weeks.

Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.

- Colossians 3:12-15 (NLT)

"Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others." There it is! What else is there to say? It's a requirement. You MUST forgive others. The end. There are no conditions to said forgiveness or circumstances in which it's an option. Forgive.

"Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you." I read that and start throwing out excuses. Man, that's not easy. And right now, I just don't want to. I'm mad. I'm still hurt. Look how I was wronged. Oh, but wait a minute...I start to hear God screaming, "IT ISN'T ABOUT YOU!"  

"Remember, the Lord forgave you..." That's right, He sure did. And look what I've done to hurt Him and wrong Him and upset Him. I promise you it was more than once...and I promise you it was much bigger than any wrong that will ever be done to me, any hurt that I will ever feel, or any anger that's stirred inside my being.

That's why God is God and I am not! His response to everything I've done is mercy and kindness and gentleness and patience and LOVE. He doesn't look my junk. He's FORGIVEN me. To Him, I appear perfect and without fault. How do you even begin to wrap your head around that one.

And that's the kind of love and forgiveness I am ordered to extend to someone who has "offended" me?

Well God, fill me with that love. Make me able to forgive. Let me be merciful. Humble my prideful heart and stubborn mind. Give me words and thoughts and actions that speak kindness and gentleness and nothing more.

Doesn't Get Any Better...

The faithful love of the LORD never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.

-Lamentations 3:22-23 (NLT)

Thank you, Lord for loving everyone...even me...unconditionally! Help me love like you do! :)

It's Not Mine...

This was just something I REALLY needed to hear today...So, thought I'd share it! It's one of those ideas that I know all to well...just don't seem to whole-heartedly trust or belive...if that makes any sense at all! I mean why shouldn't I give every bit of my life every single day to God -- I mean really, it's not mine anyways! He paid the price, it's ALL for Him!

So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.

-Romans 12:1-2 (The Message)

There's Always More To The Picture...

Wow, I've been a crab lately; I get in "moods" like this sometimes and it normally takes time but I snap out of it. I always end up realizing I am wasting my time and therefore wasting my life. Sometimes life sucks, period. And it's so easy to just sit and be mad, or sad, or feel sorry for myself, which is silly. So what if I had a hard day, someone else had one just as bad, probably worse. It seems like every time I think I have a plan or things figured out, a huge wrench gets thrown into all of it, but most of the time it ends up working out, maybe not the way I'd planned, but working out nonetheless. And sometimes it doesn't work out, it never gets resolved and there are all these lose ends and here comes the frustration and whining again. That's why I love this verse:

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.

- Romans 8:28 (NLT)

It may sound like a copout to a lot of people, but that's not it at all. At first glance it's easy to say that God doesn't really give a crap about people, because He lets horrible things happen to them all the time, but there's a plan, a reason, a rhyme to all of it...every bit of it.

In so many instances in the Bible peoples' pain and suffering have actually brought them closer to God. I know that has happened in my own life; I get caught up in believing lies about what a "good" life or a "fun" life should be or should look like and I decide I will slide right onto that path and I end up crashing, badly. Maybe the ending is something as small as puking until I pass out and then waking up and not being able to get out of bed all day because I am so sick, or maybe it's bigger maybe I lose a best friend for reasons I can't bring myself to say.

But, either way, God is always there. When I've hit that dead end and don't want to go back to where I was He pulls me up out of it all. And all the times He's done this I eventually see why I had to go through what I did – right now I am going through some things I don't understand, but I will, one day.

One thing that is consistent throughout all these trials and sufferings is my sinfulness: jealousy, greed, lust, lying, or just not loving people. A lot of times I can't see it – but when I do it kills me. I know other people notice these things, it may or may not bother them, but it disturbs me. Here I go claiming to be a follower of Jesus Christ and I am not acting any different than the rest of the world. I want to apologize, but don't know where to start, so, I'm sorry.

Since I am human, I will never be perfect, but as a Christian I am called to live a life like Jesus, who WAS perfect, without a single sin. This is kind of hard to wrap my head around, but I understand enough to know that I've got a lot of work to do – and even if I give it 110% the rest of my life I will still be nowhere close. The beautiful thing is that God gave His Son to fill in that "gap" that I will never be able to fill.

This is not at all turning out to be what I wanted to say, but that is okay. What I was trying to get at is most everyone looks down on Christians and says, "Hypocrites!" and it really bugs me. It bugs me the most because in most instances it is true, very, very true. I know I used to run around calling myself a Christian in one sentence, cussing out and threatening to beat up a girl in my next breath, then calling up the boys who would be buying the alcohol for our party that night. But it also bugs me because not every Christian is like that. Luckily God gives second, and third, and fourth chances.

But, unfortunately, more times than not, people just continue to live their lives focused on themselves and all the things in this world that surrounds them, all the while calling themselves Christians. Maybe they are getting drunk every weekend, or having sex with every person they have the chance to, or stealing from their parents, or selling drugs, or abusing their children, and then showing up to church on Sunday in new clothes and a nice car, getting hugs and handshakes from everyone and then playing with all the kids on the playground. Maybe they look like they have their live together. It would almost seem like they can do whatever they want during the week, as long as they show up to church on Sunday and maybe bible study on Wednesday once in a while.

This is not how God works. He can't be "tricked" into thinking you are a Christian. He doesn't care how many times you show up to church or youth group or volunteering or bible study. He wants your heart, mind, your soul; and if you've given that to Him, the "time commitments" and "good deeds" will follow – it has to work in that order. It can't be a checklist of activities and resume-builders.

Okay, I still haven't said what I wanted to so I will just quote random bits and pieces from someone else who has completely nailed it:

"It is hard to deny that tragedy can bring out the best in people. But when Peter Kreeft suggested that God might allow some horrible things because more people will be better for it in the long run, I shook my head.

'That's still hard to accept,' I told him...

'Okay then let's put it to the test,' [he] replied. 'You see, God has shown us very clearly how this can work. He has demonstrated how the very worst thing that has ever happened in the history or the world ended up resulting in the very best thing that ever happened in the history of the world. The death of God himself on the cross,' he replied. 'There Christ hung on the cross – forsaken by his friends and seemingly by God, bleeding to death and crying 'My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?' And the result was that heaven was opened to human beings.'...

'And that brings me to what may be the most important good thing that God could bring out of your pain and suffering,' [he] said. 'God might just use it to get your attention and draw you close to him.'...

Even if God can use suffering to accomplish good things, I still had a complaint for Peter. 'Evil people hurt others all the time. Surely God can't think that's fair! Terrorists and rapists and bullies on grade school playgrounds and the powerful people who make life miserable or their peers on high school campuses – why does God let them get away with it?'

'People aren't getting away with it; the fact that God hasn't evened the score in every case doesn't mean that he won't. Criticizing him for not doing it yet is like reading half a novel and then criticizing the author for not tying up the loose ends of the plot. In fact, the Bible says that the day will come when sickness and pain will be wiped out and people will be held accountable for the suffering they've caused.'

'But he's delaying that day so that more people can put their trust in him and spend eternity with him. The Bible says 'The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance' [2 Peter 3:9]."

- Lee Strobel with Jane Vogel

Just A Thought...

Behold, I will rebuke your offspring, and spread dung on your faces, the dung of your offerings, and you shall be taken away with it.

-Malachi 2:3 (ESV)

Harsh, right? Well, God doesn't mess around. But before you are like "What! Dung...on someone's face! What kind of God could He possibly be?" look at what's going on here. Back in the Old Testament days, before Jesus came to die for our sins, people were required to offer sacrifices in order to be forgiven and made right with God. In this particular instance there were these priests were who completely disrespecting God by offering unworthy sacrifices, like blind and crippled and sick animals. They were priests for goodness sake, they were supposed to be setting an example and they knew better. They were supposed to be leading people along the righteous path, but they themselves were not even following God! This was causing others to fall into sin and stumble in their understanding and relationship with God.

So wasn't it almost like these people who throwing crap is God's face? Telling Him they didn't think he was worthy of the "good" sacrifices, or they didn't really need to obey all the laws. God just wanted these people to come back to Him, obey him, stop making excuses and stop trying to "pull one over" on Him. But, if they continued to refuse, then they would be thrown out along with their worthless offerings.

I also think we have to remember that the Bible in its entirety is not meant to be taken literally, I mean some things, yes, but just use your own judgment and common sense; if you still have no clue, pray about it, ask God to show you what the heck He means. I'm not the witty, scholarly type by any means and sometimes it is hard to wrap my mind around what I am reading, but God's plan isn't to confuse us, so keep looking, keep asking, keep questioning.

If That's What It Takes...

And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.

-Matthew 5:30 (ESV)

The Strictest Discipline – Oswald Chambers

"Jesus did not say that everyone must cut off his right hand, but that "if your right hand causes you to sin" in your walk with Him, then it's better to "cut it off". There are many things that are perfectly legitimate, but if you are going to concentrate on God you cannot do them. Your right hand is one of the best things you have, but Jesus says that is it hinders you in following His precepts, then "cut it off". The principle taught here is the strictest discipline or lesson that ever hit humankind.
When God changes you through regeneration, giving you new life through spiritual rebirth, your life initially has the characteristic of being maimed. There are a hundred and one things that you dare not do—things that would be sin for you, and things that would be recognized as sin by those who really know you. But the unspiritual people around you will say, "What's so wrong with doing that? How absurd you are!" There has never yet been a saint who has not lived a maimed life initially. Yet it is better to enter into life maimed but lovely in God's sight than to appear lovely to man's eyes but lame to God's. At first, Jesus Christ through His Spirit has to restrain you from doing a great many things that may be perfectly right for everyone else but not right for you.
The Christian life is maimed life initially, but in verse 48 Jesus gave us the picture of a perfectly well-rounded life—"You shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect.""

I really love that verse! The severity of it just makes wheels start turning. It's so true how there are things that many Christ followers would never even imagine doing, but that same thing is a walk in the park for the next person. It's almost upsetting sometimes when people who know your beliefs and convictions try to coerce into doing something that you consider sin! Or they tease you because "you're such a good little girl, you would never do anything fun anyways..." Yeah, it really hurts my feelings. So maybe I don't like to do the same things I used to do all the time, that I though were fun and I didn't see any sort of problem with. But this is my LIFE we are talking about, there is really no point in jeopardizing that for what the world perceives as a "good time".

It's Just Ridiculous...

If you live in Indy you might have heard about the recent "Would Jesus Discriminate" crap. A local church is twisting biblical truth to try and convince people that the Bible, as well as Jesus himself supports homosexuality. I honestly have no problem at all with people who are gay...I have friends who are gay. But accepting people and loving them no matter how they choose to live their lives is a totally different from distorting what is clearly stated in the Bible. "Pastor" Minor (Jesus Metropolitan Community Church) and his followers attempt to rewrite scripture to sanctify their sexual desires in the name of loving "tolerance." However, is it really considered loving to lead people in opposition to the will of God? The Bible isn't unclear on the issue; I mean do verses like these leave any room for uncertainty?

Don't you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Don't fool yourselves. Those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are male prostitutes, or practice homosexuality, or are thieves, or greedy people, or drunkards, or are abusive, or cheat people—none of these will inherit the Kingdom of God.

-1 Corinthians 6:9-10 (NLT)

Do not practice homosexuality, having sex with another man as with a woman. It is a detestable sin.

-Leviticus 18:22 (NLT)

This upsets me that people are being deceived therefore giving up the eternal life that is obtainable to them through the forgiveness of Jesus Christ. Please pray for this church and others of this sort to be stamped out by the truth.

I'm Broken...

This is like my favorite Psalm! I have found myself praying this a lot lately! I am broken and can't even explain how I am feeling! I'm so stressed! I continue to believe lies that this world forces on me and I don't know why! I know the truth in the back of my mind and in my heart, but I fail to believe it 100% of the time! I get so down on myself when I sin and run to things that aren't going to make it better, but Jesus died to take all those sins away, I just NEED to believe it whole-heartedly! Pray for me, please!

"Have mercy on me, O God, because of your unfailing love. Because of your great compassion, blot out the stain of my sins.
Wash me clean from my guilt. Purify me from my sin.
For I recognize my shameful deeds--they haunt me day and night.
Against you, and you alone, have I sinned; I have done what is evil in your sight. You will be proved right in what you say, and your judgment against me is just.
For I was born a sinner--yes, from the moment my mother conceived me.
But you desire honesty from the heart, so you can teach me to be wise in my inmost being.
Purify me from my sins,and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
Oh, give me back my joy again;you have broken me--now let me rejoice.
Don't keep looking at my sins. Remove the stain of my guilt.
Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a right spirit within me.
Do not banish me from your presence, and don't take your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me again the joy of your salvation, and make me willing to obey you.
Then I will teach your ways to sinners, and they will return to you.
Forgive me for shedding blood, O God who saves; then I will joyfully sing of your forgiveness.
Unseal my lips, O Lord, that I may praise you.
You would not be pleased with sacrifices, or I would bring them. If I brought you a burnt offering, you would not accept it.
The sacrifice you want is a broken spirit. A broken and repentant heart, O God, you will not despise."

-Psalm 51:1-17