Monday, September 22, 2008

Maybe, Maybe Not...

This song is amazing, period. I don't care what you believe or don't believe about Christianity or any other religion. Everyone has questions - because none of us have all the answers. That's where faith comes into play. It could be faith that there is a God or that there is no God, either way it's faith. And either way we could be right or wrong, again, we don't have the answers...all we have is faith.

What If - Nichole Nordeman
"What if you're right?
And he was just another nice guy
What if you're right?
What if it's true?
They say the cross will only make a fool of you
And what if it's true?

What if he takes his palace in history
With all the prophets and the kings
Who taught us love and came in peace
But then the story ends
What then?

But what if you're wrong?
What if there's more?
What if there's hope you never dreamed of hoping for?
What if you jump?
And just close your eyes?
What if the arms that catch you, catch you by surprise?
What if He's more than enough?
What if it's love?

What if you dig, What if you dig
Way down deeper than your simple-minded friends
What if you dig?
What if you find
A thousand more unanswered questions inside
That's all you find

What if you pick apart the logic
And begin to poke the holes
What if the crown of thorns is no more
Then folklore that must be told and retold

But what if you're wrong?
What if there's more?
What if there's hope you never dreamed of hoping for?
What if you jump?
And just close your eyes?
What if the arms that catch you, catch you by surprise?
What if He's more than enough?
What if it's love?

You've been running as fast as you can
You've been looking for a place you can land so long
But what if you're wrong?

What if you jump?
And just close your eyes?
What if the arms that catch you, catch you by surprise?
What if He's more than enough?
What if it's love?"

So what if I am making a fool of myself and living my life for something that is ancient history and has no meaning today? What if I am wrong...but, what if I'm not?

Friday, September 19, 2008

If The World Was...

Over the summer, I took a Strategic Management class and the slide below was the introduction to the first lecture; I'm sure it had more to do with the last statement about having a college education, but I couldn't make it past the third point with out getting a little disturbed; but when we came to the fourth, and fifth, and sixth I started to get a more and more uneasy and even kind of angry.

This bothers me, really bothers me!

Why don't people simply lend a hand? So what if it's not the most convenient or easy or inexpensive thing to do – I bet someone has helped you at some point in your life when it wasn't easy or convenient or cheap.

There is so much injustice in this world, and why doesn't anyone care? Oh, because it doesn't affect us in the "wonderful" United States of America? Look around people!

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Oh, Single Life...

I was going through old e-mails and I found this little peice of encouragement that I received from a friend a while back. I'm so glad I stumbled acorss it - it was exactly what I needed to hear. There was not author listed, so, like any good generation y-er would do, I googled it - but still cannot find an author. So to whomever wrote this, thanks!

"Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone -- to have a deep soul relationship with another; to be loved thoroughly and exclusively; but God, to a Christian, says:

"No, not until you're satisfied, fulfilled and content with being loved by Me alone; with giving yourself totally and unreservedly to me; to having an intensely personal relationship with me alone; discovering that only in Me is your satisfaction to be planned for you.

You will never be united with another until you are united with Me -- exclusive of anyone or anything else, exclusive of any other desires or longings. I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, and allow Me to give you the most thrilling plan existing, one that you cannot imagine. I want you to have the best. Please allow me to bring it to you. You just keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things. Keep experiencing the satisfaction that I Am. Keep listening and learning the things I tell you.

You just wait. That's all.

Don't be anxious; don't worry. Don't look around at the things that others have gotten or that I've given them. Don't look at the things you think you want. You just keep looking off and away up to Me, or you'll miss what I want to show you. And then, when you're ready, I'll surprise you with a love far more wonderful than any you would ever dream of.

You see, until you are ready, and until the one I have for you is ready (for I am working even at this moment to have both of you ready at the same time), until you are both satisfied and exclusively with Me and the life I prepared for you, you won't be able to experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with Me, and thus the perfect love.

And, dear one, I want you to see, in the flesh, a picture of your everlasting union of beauty, perfection and love that I offer you with Myself. Know that I love you utterly. I AM. Believe it and be satisfied."

So, it is difficult to fight all my girly emotions about dating and marriage and kids and all of the things that come along with each of those, but I know I have to stay focused on God, and trust that His plan for me is better than anything I can imagine. And things like that are easy to say, but when it comes right down to actually believing it, it's hard – it's really hard. But I'm going to press on.

There's Always More To The Picture...

Wow, I've been a crab lately; I get in "moods" like this sometimes and it normally takes time but I snap out of it. I always end up realizing I am wasting my time and therefore wasting my life. Sometimes life sucks, period. And it's so easy to just sit and be mad, or sad, or feel sorry for myself, which is silly. So what if I had a hard day, someone else had one just as bad, probably worse. It seems like every time I think I have a plan or things figured out, a huge wrench gets thrown into all of it, but most of the time it ends up working out, maybe not the way I'd planned, but working out nonetheless. And sometimes it doesn't work out, it never gets resolved and there are all these lose ends and here comes the frustration and whining again. That's why I love this verse:

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
- Romans 8:28 (NLT)

It may sound like a copout to a lot of people, but that's not it at all. At first glance it's easy to say that God doesn't really give a crap about people, because He lets horrible things happen to them all the time, but there's a plan, a reason, a rhyme to all of it...every bit of it.

In so many instances in the Bible peoples' pain and suffering have actually brought them closer to God. I know that has happened in my own life; I get caught up in believing lies about what a "good" life or a "fun" life should be or should look like and I decide I will slide right onto that path and I end up crashing, badly. Maybe the ending is something as small as puking until I pass out and then waking up and not being able to get out of bed all day because I am so sick, or maybe it's bigger maybe I lose a best friend for reasons I can't bring myself to say.

But, either way, God is always there. When I've hit that dead end and don't want to go back to where I was He pulls me up out of it all. And all the times He's done this I eventually see why I had to go through what I did – right now I am going through some things I don't understand, but I will, one day.

One thing that is consistent throughout all these trials and sufferings is my sinfulness: jealousy, greed, lust, lying, or just not loving people. A lot of times I can't see it – but when I do it kills me. I know other people notice these things, it may or may not bother them, but it disturbs me. Here I go claiming to be a follower of Jesus Christ and I am not acting any different than the rest of the world. I want to apologize, but don't know where to start, so, I'm sorry.

Since I am human, I will never be perfect, but as a Christian I am called to live a life like Jesus, who WAS perfect, without a single sin. This is kind of hard to wrap my head around, but I understand enough to know that I've got a lot of work to do – and even if I give it 110% the rest of my life I will still be nowhere close. The beautiful thing is that God gave His Son to fill in that "gap" that I will never be able to fill.

This is not at all turning out to be what I wanted to say, but that is okay. What I was trying to get at is most everyone looks down on Christians and says, "Hypocrites!" and it really bugs me. It bugs me the most because in most instances it is true, very, very true. I know I used to run around calling myself a Christian in one sentence, cussing out and threatening to beat up a girl in my next breath, then calling up the boys who would be buying the alcohol for our party that night. But it also bugs me because not every Christian is like that. Luckily God gives second, and third, and fourth chances.

But, unfortunately, more times than not, people just continue to live their lives focused on themselves and all the things in this world that surrounds them, all the while calling themselves Christians. Maybe they are getting drunk every weekend, or having sex with every person they have the chance to, or stealing from their parents, or selling drugs, or abusing their children, and then showing up to church on Sunday in new clothes and a nice car, getting hugs and handshakes from everyone and then playing with all the kids on the playground. Maybe they look like they have their live together. It would almost seem like they can do whatever they want during the week, as long as they show up to church on Sunday and maybe bible study on Wednesday once in a while.

This is not how God works. He can't be "tricked" into thinking you are a Christian. He doesn't care how many times you show up to church or youth group or volunteering or bible study. He wants your heart, mind, your soul; and if you've given that to Him, the "time commitments" and "good deeds" will follow – it has to work in that order. It can't be a checklist of activities and resume-builders.

Okay, I still haven't said what I wanted to so I will just quote random bits and pieces from someone else who has completely nailed it:

"It is hard to deny that tragedy can bring out the best in people. But when Peter Kreeft suggested that God might allow some horrible things because more people will be better for it in the long run, I shook my head.

'That's still hard to accept,' I told him...

'Okay then let's put it to the test,' [he] replied. 'You see, God has shown us very clearly how this can work. He has demonstrated how the very worst thing that has ever happened in the history or the world ended up resulting in the very best thing that ever happened in the history of the world. The death of God himself on the cross,' he replied. 'There Christ hung on the cross – forsaken by his friends and seemingly by God, bleeding to death and crying 'My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?' And the result was that heaven was opened to human beings.'...

'And that brings me to what may be the most important good thing that God could bring out of your pain and suffering,' [he] said. 'God might just use it to get your attention and draw you close to him.'...

Even if God can use suffering to accomplish good things, I still had a complaint for Peter. 'Evil people hurt others all the time. Surely God can't think that's fair! Terrorists and rapists and bullies on grade school playgrounds and the powerful people who make life miserable or their peers on high school campuses – why does God let them get away with it?'

'People aren't getting away with it; the fact that God hasn't evened the score in every case doesn't mean that he won't. Criticizing him for not doing it yet is like reading half a novel and then criticizing the author for not tying up the loose ends of the plot. In fact, the Bible says that the day will come when sickness and pain will be wiped out and people will be held accountable for the suffering they've caused.'

'But he's delaying that day so that more people can put their trust in him and spend eternity with him. The Bible says 'The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance' [2 Peter 3:9]."
- Lee Strobel with Jane Vogel

Thursday, September 04, 2008

Just A Thought...

Behold, I will rebuke your offspring, and spread dung on your faces, the dung of your offerings, and you shall be taken away with it.
-Malachi 2:3 (ESV)

Harsh, right? Well, God doesn't mess around. But before you are like "What! Dung...on someone's face! What kind of God could He possibly be?" look at what's going on here. Back in the Old Testament days, before Jesus came to die for our sins, people were required to offer sacrifices in order to be forgiven and made right with God. In this particular instance there were these priests were who completely disrespecting God by offering unworthy sacrifices, like blind and crippled and sick animals. They were priests for goodness sake, they were supposed to be setting an example and they knew better. They were supposed to be leading people along the righteous path, but they themselves were not even following God! This was causing others to fall into sin and stumble in their understanding and relationship with God.

So wasn't it almost like these people who throwing crap is God's face? Telling Him they didn't think he was worthy of the "good" sacrifices, or they didn't really need to obey all the laws. God just wanted these people to come back to Him, obey him, stop making excuses and stop trying to "pull one over" on Him. But, if they continued to refuse, then they would be thrown out along with their worthless offerings.

I also think we have to remember that the Bible in its entirety is not meant to be taken literally, I mean some things, yes, but just use your own judgment and common sense; if you still have no clue, pray about it, ask God to show you what the heck He means. I'm not the witty, scholarly type by any means and sometimes it is hard to wrap my mind around what I am reading, but God's plan isn't to confuse us, so keep looking, keep asking, keep questioning.

Tuesday, September 02, 2008


"The first of three problems with comparison is that we usually compare out weakness with another's strength--leading us to a skewed apples/oranges conclusion. Second, what we believe we see in someone else might not be reality! We tend to exaggerate and overestimate the strength of others. Finally--and please hear this--our wounds and weakness, though painful, carry secret treasure and strengths that could be gained no other way. Our wounds do not make us inferior, but too often they cause us to feel inferior."
-Steve Stephens

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Even When...

Even When - Seven Places
"Although I'm In This Flesh,
It Doesn't Mean You Shouldn't Have The Best,
From Me, From Me...

I Will Lift My Voice & Make A Joyful Sound,
Forget About Me, I Only Get Me Down,
Although I Cannot See It Doesn't Mean I Shouldn't Sing To You, To You...

Even When My Eyes Are Dry,
Even When My Soul Is Tired,
Even When My Hands Are Heavy, I Will Lift Them Up To You...
It's Not About How I Feel, Oh Lord I Am Here For You,
I Exist For You...

You've Given Me Your Life & Have Held Mine Together Yet I Find,
Excuses To Slouch In My Pew...
But When Glory Divine,
Is Sitting In My Very Presence, The Least That I Can Do,
Is Give My All To You, Give My All To You..."

Wednesday, August 06, 2008

Deepest Fear...

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure about you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

-Marianne Williamson/Revolution Church Atlanta

Monday, August 04, 2008


So today was one of those fantastic days when things just clicked. You know, when you feel like you are exactly where you are supposed to be at that exact moment. Actually, this entire last week has been like that! I am beyond blessed – and I can't thank the Lord enough! I just don't even know where to start...I guess I will just leave it there! I want to jump up and down – you just have no idea!


My eyes have been opened to how stubborn I have been lately. I have been so worried about crap! Seriously, crap! It finally just hit me – be still! I knew this though, why don't I act like it? God's got it under control. I know that every time I have a "plan", God steps in and turns it upside down and shows me what His plan for that particular situation is! I may not quite understand why, well...I usually don't understand why, but I know it's going to turn out way better than anything I attempt on my own!

I also wanted to say sorry! I keep going on and on about how I am sick of people being hypocrites, well I am just as guilty as the next person! Sometimes I wish people could see my heart and my intensions, but they can't – they see how I act on the outside. I sure haven't been painting a very pretty picture with my life lately! I WANT Jesus to shine through me! So to those of you who are like, "She is another one of those 'Christians'...", I'm so sorry! I'm human so unfortunately I am going to sin! Luckily I can run right back into God's arms and ask forgiveness and He reminds me how much I am loved! And so can anyone else...It is such a sweet deal!

So once again...


Friday, August 01, 2008

Undo & Thank You...

Just really want to say thank you to one of my really good friends! I'm sure he has no idea what he did...but thank you! I keep talking and talking and talking...but I haven't done anything to back it up - thank you for calling me out! :) I needed it!

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

If That's What It Takes...

And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.
-Matthew 5:30 (ESV)
The Strictest Discipline – Oswald Chambers
"Jesus did not say that everyone must cut off his right hand, but that "if your right hand causes you to sin" in your walk with Him, then it's better to "cut it off". There are many things that are perfectly legitimate, but if you are going to concentrate on God you cannot do them. Your right hand is one of the best things you have, but Jesus says that is it hinders you in following His precepts, then "cut it off". The principle taught here is the strictest discipline or lesson that ever hit humankind.
When God changes you through regeneration, giving you new life through spiritual rebirth, your life initially has the characteristic of being maimed. There are a hundred and one things that you dare not do—things that would be sin for you, and things that would be recognized as sin by those who really know you. But the unspiritual people around you will say, "What's so wrong with doing that? How absurd you are!" There has never yet been a saint who has not lived a maimed life initially. Yet it is better to enter into life maimed but lovely in God's sight than to appear lovely to man's eyes but lame to God's. At first, Jesus Christ through His Spirit has to restrain you from doing a great many things that may be perfectly right for everyone else but not right for you.
The Christian life is maimed life initially, but in verse 48 Jesus gave us the picture of a perfectly well-rounded life—"You shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect.""

I really love that verse! The severity of it just makes wheels start turning. It's so true how there are things that many Christ followers would never even imagine doing, but that same thing is a walk in the park for the next person. It's almost upsetting sometimes when people who know your beliefs and convictions try to coerce into doing something that you consider sin! Or they tease you because "you're such a good little girl, you would never do anything fun anyways..." Yeah, it really hurts my feelings. So maybe I don't like to do the same things I used to do all the time, that I though were fun and I didn't see any sort of problem with. But this is my LIFE we are talking about, there is really no point in jeopardizing that for what the world perceives as a "good time".

Wednesday, June 25, 2008


It's so easy for a while to just shove everything to the side and make excuse after excuse and say you'll do better tomorrow, or you will just deal with it all later. I have been doing that in so many areas lately and it has just all built up and I get so frustrated. It is true the Lord's mercies are fresh each morning, but it is wrong to abuse that fact, and I certainly have been. It's absolutely heartbreaking, mainly to God, but also to me and many people who I come in contact with. I honestly can't stand when people claim to be Christians and deny Jesus with every choice they make, I refuse to be one of those "Christians". I want to apologize to a few people who I care a lot about. I haven't been the kind of friend that I am called to be lately, and I hope you guys will forgive me. This little bit of truth hit me hard today…

Reconciling Yourself To The Fact Of Sin – Oswald Chambers
"Not being reconciled to the fact of sin – not recognizing it and refusing to deal with it – produces all the disasters in life. You may talk about the lofty virtues of human nature, but there is something in human nature, that will mockingly laugh in the face of every principle you have. If you refuse to agree with the fact that there is wickedness and selfishness, something downright hateful and wrong, in human being, when it attacks your life, instead of reconciling yourself to it, you will compromise with is and say that it is of this "hour, and the power of darkness" into which includes no recognition of sin whatsoever? In your human relationships and friendships, how you reconciled yourself to the fact of sin? If not, just around the next corner you ill find yourself trapped and you will compromise with it. But if you will reconcile yourself to the fact of sin, you will realize the danger immediately and say, "Yes, I see what this sin would mean." The recognition of sin does not destroy the basis of friendship – it simply establishes a mutual respect for the face that the basis of sinful life is disastrous. Always beware of any assessment of life which does not recognize the face that there is sin.

Jesus Christ never trusted human nature, yet He was never cynical nor suspicious, because He had absolute trust in what He could do for human nature. The pure man or woman is the one who is shielded from harm, not the innocent person, The so-called innocent man or woman is never safe. Men and women have no business trying to be innocent; God demands that they be pure and virtuous. Innocence is the characteristic of a child. Any person is deserving of blame if he is unwilling to reconcile himself to the face of sin."

Friday, January 04, 2008

Quote For The Day...

"Just because someone didn't love you the way you wanted them to, doesn't mean they didn't love you with all they had."